Just one step closer towards a fine and cold holiday. Tomorrow will be the last class, the last sufferance of this tiring and hard year.
The fatigue and pressure are a great impact in my life. My life of a simple man learning to become wise by not stepping on his own poop. My simple definition of wise.
Because poop itself is a waste, and learning to hold your feet of steeping on the waste you tried to disintegrate is cool enough.
Learning to survive alone, trying to hold the cane with your own trembling. Walking with your surrounding's reflections rather that giving out and projects your own blurry image. Or maybe the image itself is so blurry that it defines a total perplexity for others. Well, the best thing of walking in the shadow is that you don't have the blame of committing errors to yourself, or feeling guilty of the mistake due to your own clumsy manner.
And you can play hide a seek. hiding through the vast accumulating shadows. lost in the darkness. too afraid to go out and smell the fresh air of responsibility. afraid to look up cuz the sunlight ray is so dense, it pokes your eyes till they break into tears. Not enough courage, to walk by your own path then commit a mistake,to fall, and succumb, to get hurt or even burned, to feel the pain, and the bruises decorated on your hand. a mark of a true warrior.
Walk around with blood represent the downfall and the hardship you learn from life. walk tall with the broken nose, a nice smell of blood dripping through your nose, having different cuts throughout your faces. Then you walk with high attitude. feeling proud.
And i sit there, all alone in my tiny spot. staring and staring, afraid to make the first pace. so maybe afraid to feel hurt. and just wondering, when will my savior save me from this horror of staring at a dark image of yourself.
eerie....
"Dear God, navigate me towards the right path and holds my paces from the path of evil. and help me in collecting the hints to construct a better home.a more welcoming and warmth one. because ime still long enough in defining my way back home...."